Out for the Summer

Monday, May 30, 2016

This was the first day of summer break. Just let that sink in for a minute...

(sorrynotsorry for using this picture!)

I spent the weekend writing various things - a speech for graduation, my very last essay for the Circe apprenticeship, aaalllllll of my progress reports. Which meant that I could actually FEEL like today was the first day of summer break, with nothing hanging over my head and nothing to write but a run-on, rambling little blog post here. Do the things I feel like saying necessarily go together? Maybe! Probably not. I'm okay with that.

Tristan is four months old today, which always seems like such a milestone. Not only did he devour his first helping of cereal for dinner, but we spent the afternoon moving things around so he could start sleeping in his crib tonight. In the room he's going to share with Avalon from now on. Not two feet away from my face anymore. My bedroom looks crazy empty now that it's not all crowded with baby gear, and I keep obsessively checking the video monitor to make sure he's okay.

He's fine.

It's just different. A relief, but different all the same. Which is basically how I feel about the school year being over. No more teaching-while-juggling-a-baby, which was amazing and difficult. No more of our seniors, who drove us insane but stole our hearts. No more Circe apprenticeship assignments and webinars, which were hard to fit into my schedule but usually the highlights of my week. No more of what was, in my opinion, one of the hardest school years we've had. It's been almost exactly a year since I found out I was pregnant with Tristan, and I have been more sick and more exhausted in this past year than I would have thought possible. I mean, WORTH IT, hello!

But this year has not been easy by any stretch of the imagination. The upper school spent the last day of school at the zoo (hence the kangaroo picture!) and there is a baby gorilla there who is just Tristan's size. Tristan was asleep in his sling when I went up to check out the baby, but he caught the mama gorilla's eye anyway. She came over to get a better look, then picked up her baby to show me, and we had a whole conversation about motherhood. We did, really. First and foremost we agreed that the babies were perfect and wonderful and probably the cutest things in the whole world. But also... "I feel you, mama. It's amazing, but it's hard, huh?" I said. And she looked me in the eyes and leaned her forehead on the glass by my face and heaved a great big sigh. You can ask Aaron, if you don't believe me, he saw the whole thing. It was a MOMENT.

And even though the year, and especially the last half of the semester, has been so hard, it's been amazing. I've always thought that there are so many benefits to having teens and babies in close quarters with one another. I think they get too separated and distanced for the most part. The students were endlessly fascinated with Tristan, he sparked so many questions and observations and plans for, "someday when I have a kid..." It was just beautiful.
He didn't mind having so many friends to play with all day, either.

Now it's all done with and these guys have graduated.

They can...fly free.

(Still not sorry!!)

1 comment:

  1. Ahh, summer! It sounds like hopefully it will be a much needed break... But knowing you, likely still crazy busy. It'll just be a break from the normal stuff and lots of other stuff going on. I would have loved to see the mama gorilla's reaction to Tristan! That whole incident sounds awesome!


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